This season of life...

A very rough writting I have been rolling around my head since the shock of my grandma's incident. That first night the thoughts rolling around my head were "this season of life is so hard as I watch people I admire and look up to grow older and watch the people I love begin to slip away. I feel lost as I grow to the generation that someone behind me will be looking to. I don't feel ready for that responsibility. I don't feel like I can fit thier shoes... I don't know if I can walk how they walked and be worthy to be admired..." but then I think about my mom in a dofferent season with a different kind of pain than mine and yet it is still pain and suffering. No season is exempt.

Enter this world, learning to breathe air.

Cold, hungry and scared.

Warmth, cuddled, loved.

Uncomfortable, screaming, can't say what I want!

This season of life is hard....

Bottle is taken. Binky too! Naptime now.

New food, mouth hurts, mommy says “No!”

Trying to be big while still being small.

Learning to speak with new words and all.

This season of life is hard...

Making new friends and playing around.

Meeting new people. I don't get my way.

Life is not fair. Learning to share.

New rules, New schools, growing every day.

This season of life is hard…

Playing it cool. Terrified inside.

Making good grades. College on my brain.

Essays, exams and the late night cram.

Chores to do. Curfew too. "No invite for you."

This season of life is hard…

College exams, working demands.

Finding “true love", meeting “the one".

Breakups, heart aches

Study groups, another 40 page paper due

This season of life is hard…

Babies burping, spitting, “Diapers are out!”

Tired mess, get some rest.

Daycare...nightmare…”he’s where?!!”

First tooth...first steps. “Don’t eat that!”

This season of life is hard…

Kids are yelling. “I’m telling!”

Sickness comes. Blood tests run.

Big scares. “hug and share!” “that's not fair!”

Get them to school. “Our house, I rule.”

This season of life is hard…

Loved ones aging, their health is wanning…

Kids keep growing, driving test. What a mess!

Grey hairs are showing. Bills keep flowing.

Time isn't slowing. Where is it going?

This season of life is hard…

Children leave home. They go on their own.

Home is quiet and clean. Too quiet...too clean…

Take daddy to the doctor,

Remind mom to take her pills.

This season of life is hard…

Grandbabies come visit. Kids bring delight.

Their parents are struggling, don't pick any sides.

Mom is in rehab, dad forgets at night.

Retirement sounds lovely but finances are tight.

This season of life is hard...

Traveling and fun. Hospice called in.

A garden to tend. Dad’s funeral to plan.

Making time to see friends. Long conversations with him.

Stretching funds til the end.

This season of life is hard...

Sitting alone in the lounge at “the home".

Grandkids come visit when their weekends are free.

They have their own lives. Oh! BINGO’s at 3!

The silence is eerie,  while call lights just blink.

This season of life is hard...